Special Moments Between Us in 2010 :)

09.01.2010 - Celebrated Birthday Bash with you along with my high school friends. ( Past & Upcoming January Babies Birthday Bash )

13.01.2010 - Experienced another unforgettable moment with you when your car battery ran out. ( Memorable Day Yet Again )

19.02.2010 - First time attacking people's house in CNY with you.

20.02.2010 - First time attacking your house for CNY :) ( CNY Attack! )

06.03.2010 - First time shooting with you. First time went to I-City with you. ( Nothing Box Day )

26.03.2010 - First time watching night movie with you. ( Breather )

13.06.2010 - First time went to 'Japan' & 'France' with you. ( Visit to Japan & France )

28.06.2010 - You got sick. It was my first time taking care of you.

Somewhere in June - First time photoshoot with you in a hotel :)

Somewhere in July - First time went to Chili's with you.

17.07.2010 - First time played Monopoly with you & your sister :) ( Monopoly )

23.07.2010 - First time went to Port Dickson & A'Famosa with you. First time overnight with you :) ( Dessert Sea )

29.07.2010 - First time went to Genting with you. It was the best holiday we ever had :) ( "Cooling" 19th 29.07.2010 - 30.07.2010 )

06.08.2010 - Spent the longest date with you :) ( One Year Ago. Today. )

15.08.2010 - Went to Sushi King's RM2 Bonanza with you :) ( Random )

08.09.2010 - First time experienced flood with you. ( Floody Day )

18.09.2010 - First time attended a wedding dinner with you. ( Mass Update )

24.09.2010 - First time visited 8TV with you. ( Mass Update )

25.09.2010 - First time eating steamboat with you & your family :) ( Mass Update )

22.10.2010 - Celebrated our First Year Anniversary :) ( 22.10.2010 - The Mark of a New Journey )

22.10.2010 - Had our children hamster :')

19.11.2010 - Watched Harry Potter with you :) ( Harry Potter 7 Movie Date + Review )

26.11.2010 - First time eating Pasta Zanmai with you.

Somewhere in November - Seeing Bill Clinton with you.

17.12.2010 - First time working with you :) ( Working for Mass Comm. Dept. )

31.12.2010 - First time giving you a Christmas present.

31.12.2010 - First time spending New Year's Eve with you :) ( New Year's Eve 2010 )

It was a really fruitful year :) We had gone through so many special & memorable events together. I am hoping for more adventures in our journey ahead and yes, we will go through everything together, like how we did for the past 1 year & 2 months. Happy New Year! :D

Today is the last day of 2010. So I guess we know what this means -- Reflection of what we did in 2010. Right? Yeah it sure is a fun thing to reflect on what we did for the past 365. days All the memories, no matter good or bad. And so that's what I will be doing in this post. So basically, this will be a reflection post hoho!

I got a new Sony Ericsson Cybershot phone :) C510 to replace my K series. I always wanted a new phone. But I feel extremely bad to replace my old one, which is still usable, to a new one. The phone was given to me by my dad. Another thing to be grateful with :)

Chinese New Year 2010. The usual went back to hometown. But what was special this year was when I finally get to attack people's house hoho! I'm so gonna do that again in 2011 :P

Tried shooting for the first time in my life. For assignment purposes of course. And seriously, I think I have a fetish towards shooting. I love broadcasting. But sometimes it's just between what you want to do and what you should do, which is so frustrating :(

Besides that, I also helped out in the Mass Communication Day as Sponsorship Chief. It was a memorable experience to help out for that event. Learned so much & gained so much :) Oh & by the way, our music video ( supposedly assignment ) won the first prize of the music video competition! Can't be more proud :')

Attended primary school friend, Mr. Looi Shi Hao farewell party and met lots of old school friends back there :) It was a nice meet-up. We get to keep in touch with each other. And I made new friends too! :D

Went to Bukit Tinggi ( a.k.a. Japan & France ) for photoshooting purpose :) This time for our event. Never been there for my whole life and that was my first time setting foot to the awesome scenery :) We had fun there. An awesome one-day trip with the group mates. Spontaneity is the key woohoo! :D

Organized 'Communicating With Style' Event as well. Our own semester's event :) Another memorable experience once again. This time I was no more Sponsorship but I was the Secretary, something I am so used to doing :) It was so much more hectic than the Mass Communication Day, mainly because all the pressure was on our semester and we really want to make the event a success. But anyhow, we did it in the end. Awesome proud of us :')

Did research on Visual Novel for my Communication Research assignment. I always have this curiosity about Visual Novel and taking this big risk in risking my 100% to do something I really want to do is taking me to another level of breaking through myself. I am glad I made this decision. It says a lot :)

First out of the state vacation with college mates! Off to Port Dickson we went. But oops, it wasn't really as fantastic as I thought but we did went to A'Famosa Water Park and we had lots of fun there :)

My laptop's screen crashed for the second time ever since I bought it and it was awesomely irritating :(

First time meeting the Dean for School of Business. First time did Media Planning and I think it was pretty interesting :)

It was an awesome 2010 with awesome events. Even though there were things that happened unexpectedly and it broke our hearts, I believe that we will always move forward and looking forward to a better tomorrow :) Thank you for all the memories and awesome journey in 2010. Hello 2011! It will be a lot better :D

Happy New Year's Eve! :D

Did not go for any countdowns today. Reason being: Everywhere is too packed. Major reason being: Curfew. Yup. But I had an awesome New Year's Eve. Starting with the fact that I finally managed to clean up my whole room and it's not awesomely awesome. I can finally walk into the room with satisfaction and surprisingly, the tidied-up version of my room gives me more confidence now in doing anything I want to do and I am feeling so comfortable in it :P

After that was dinner with all my loved ones. My family & my tomato :) Most awesome New Year's Eve dinner. Although it was simple, it means a lot. Then after that, shopping ( or we prefer to call it strolling around the mall ) in Empire.

Another new year coming up. Bid farewell to 2010 and we will be opening our doors to 2011 soon :)

Second post of the day! Another update for Christmas! :D

So for this year's Christmas, my whole family went down to Johor, celebrated Christmas with my uncles & grandparents & other relatives who stay in Johor.

Before we went back to Johor, we stopped in Melaka to pick up my grandparents and visited my grandmother as well. Did not stroll around Melaka because it was awesomely jam in the town because of Christmas and we were rushing for time.

So there was a total of 6 passengers in the Honda Civic including the passenger. As the back seat passenger, it was so awesomely suffocating and you can't move an inch. And the trip was 2.5 hours. Awesome, right? It was around evening when we finally reached Johor.

Oh! We got presents from our uncle. Box of Ferrero Rocher :) Loves the chocolate!

Hello!

I am so so sorry for my absence on the blog these days. I owe you guys so many updates! The main reason why I'm absent from the blog is because I had too much stuff in my mind. Oh not forgetting I am in the operation of cleaning/tidy up/redecorating my room. Trust me. It's not easy at all. My room is like some 100-year-old antique mansion with dust & rubbish everywhere. Not to say that I don't clean up my room. I do. But not thoroughly everytime when I did that because I just don't have the enough time :(

Okay enough updates on my life. This post is to update you guys about my working days for Inti, to be precise, the Mass Communication Department. It was a 3-days-work (17/12/10 - 19/12/10 ) for the Open Day and me & Mr.H were working in the showcase room for the Mass Communication Department.

Pictures tell everything :)

And there were also the assignments of the business students, which was to use recycled/green products to produce a new product which can be sold to the market.

The products are nice but I would still think twice of buying one. The bags are shiny and they are made out of aluminum tins. Like, ouch. But the ideas are still nice :)

Our work days weren't really busy, though. Not many guests and we spent most of our time chilling & chatting with each other. Talk about easy money haha. But no, not getting any salary because I'm working for my scholarship. I'm only earning the working hours. For three days, I earned 22 hours, which is so worth it :)

I don't know how to describe my feelings now. It's so hard to fake a smile out of myself when I can't even get over myself.

It's nothing to do with anyone & it's not anyone's fault. It's just me.

I just want to be alone right now.

Aloha!

A short update :) Half an hour more to the 14th & really feeling awesome & grateful about it. It had been a long journey. Maybe not that long, but it was a worthy ride. Looking forward for more adventurous & enjoyable & memorable rides in the future and I know everything will be so awesome I will never regret living :)

I got so much to say but I got so limited time to update all in this post. But anyway, if I have the time, probably before Friday, I will be updating on what had I been doing for these past few days. Last weekend was hectic in the sense of spending more than half of the day outside (in college, in fact) working, but it was worth it :) Especially if I'm helping my own department, I would've done so even it means without receiving any salary. But actually, I did not receive any. Will tell you more in the next post :)

Holiday is seriously awesome. But it's coming to an end very fast :( Around 3 more weeks I guess? But anyhow, it was an awesome & enjoyable one. Finally a real holiday for me :D

p/s: I really really adore Emma Watson. She's my role model :)

I love to blog. I don't know but I feel like writing can help me release & express all the emotions embedded & immersed in me which sometimes words are not enough to describe what's inside my heart.

What am I suppose to blog about again?

Oh yeah. How my family works. You know, when you start to gain all the awesome achievements and you feel so proud & happy for yourself? Maybe it's not just how the family feels. Others as well. Sometimes it just means nothing to others and you feel like such a show-0ff when you want to share your happiness with others. Yeah. It happened to me.

I always want to share things I like with others. The things I feel happy about. I always want to share them all. I want to share my happiness. But the truth is, sometimes the message just doesn't get through, and you are left alone with the syok sendiri kinda feeling, which makes you feel extremely stupid of yourself. And not forgetting the sinking of the heart & the disappointment you feel, which makes you feel down and hopeless.

It happened to me so many times I had lost count. But I do learn from the experiences. Now, I don't really share everything I like/love with anyone anymore. Only when the similar topic emerges, then I have the courage or the passion to talk more & share more on what I know. These moments really make me happy :)

It doesn't work this way in my family as well. Family members won't be able to understand how much something means to you. Sometimes (although not purposely) the things they say will hurt you and it makes your self-esteem drop so low that you feel like the stupidest person on earth.

It happens to me. Most of the time.

It's something like, although you had done a great job in something but in the next moment, it doesn't mean anything anymore. And when you have a request, whatever you've done does not seem to exist anymore. Or perhaps, all the good things you had achieved does not mean anything anym0re. The only thing that matters at that moment of time is only the wrongdoings, which makes you feel extremely sad, or even mad at the same time.

It had always been like this in my family. I's kinda got used to it already but when things/situation emerges, I get the headache on how exactly to bring the issue up. I got no shield, no defense. So I guess I only have to bet on the timing, which is... tough.

It's 4.08 a.m. in the morning! Okay I am still awake in a holiday week & I feel myself awesome weird. But think again, I am just in a training of time-twisting since my biological clock had turned against me. Oh well. It's not exactly bad but the thing I am shocked + amazed more on is the fact that I'm still not tired even it's almost dawn. Thank you heart.

Okay so since I'm awake now, I might just do a short update/review on the movie I've watched today yesterday with Mr.Tomato.




The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader


So yeah. That's was the movie I watched in GSC. Frankly speaking, I didn't watch the previous movies of the series but my sister informed me that even if I didn't watch the previous movies I would be able to understand and thus, I decided that I can still watch this even though I got no idea what the previous movies were talking about. Will do that one of these days. Or might as well read the book, which I'm doing right now.

But to be frank, I prefer to watch the adventure-fantasy-action genre kind of movie on the screen and not in words, with the exception of the Harry Potter series.

Oh by the way, before I get out of topic and immerse myself too much in my craps again. The review. So it's about being absorbed into another world. Somehow it reminds me of lots of with the same concept (eg: Inuyasha, Fushigi Yuugi etc). Talking about anime, I haven't been watching them in awhile (yes, my on-hold list is piling up) but I've started back recently :P Okay sorry. Back to review.

So basically, I would rate this movie 6.5/10. The only thing I really like in the movie is the adventure scenes. Other than that, it's quite predictable. But somehow it managed to capture my attention for the whole 2 hours. So I wouldn't say it was a waste of ticket watching the movie. Oh and it got to start reading the book, so yeah. Oh, and I like Aslan. And the dragon, but not the kid.

I should watch the previous movies. It's not outstanding. It's average. But it reaches the average point every adventure/fantasy/action movie should have. So I guess it would be okay. Almost the same theme, but I still prefer the Harry Potter series so much more than the Narnia series. Maybe cause there's more twist in the HP series. And it continues. So there's the continuity there compared to the Narnia series. But the idea is still awesome.

A short update before my blog dies.

Holiday, so far & so good. Finally a proper holiday without any major breakdowns & depression. But actually, I realize I got this dilemma of being unable to properly rest my mind. In short, I tend to focus on things too much and pay too much attention thus, in the end, I will tend to worry to much or being paranoid. I got no idea is this a good attitude or a bad one =/ But anyway!

Results are out! And this signals the official end of my semester 5 in Diploma of Mass Communication :D One more semester (which I personally think will be the toughest ) & one internship to go & I'm done with my diploma life! For this time, I didn't really get anxious with my results like how I used to until the day itself when I realized the results can be retrieved. The results are totally unexpected and when I saw it, I stunned, yes absolutely happy because it is something I am always hoping for & it can be said to be my ultimate achievement for each semester. And finally, 4.0 flat :D

Urgh. Here comes something that's troubling me. Communication is never easy. Really. It needs the suitable time & the suitable words composure. Hmmm so how should I bring this topic up? =/

I realize I keep on having troubles or there's always something bothering my mind. Seriously, it's just my nature. This time, I let my sense of responsibility took over me.

You know, adopting a pet is not just adopting a pet. The moment you take him/her home, you are fully responsible for his/her everything. The happiness, their comfortableness, their cleanliness. Practically, everything. And the most frustrating and heartbroken thing to see is that your pet(s) is/are not doing in great shape. This is what happening to my now.

I am not saying that I regret having them, my pretty & adorable hamsters. They are one of the best things that is involved in my life and I am more than happy to adopt them and take care of them. The worse thing is when I see them suffering and not being happy living with me. I've done everything I can (including staying up till the morning and waking up after a 2-hours sleep to make sure that they are happy) and I will do everything to ensure that they are happy living as part of my family.

But it's not easy. So not easy.

They get along so well but maybe they are just not meant to be together. It's just their nature, you know. No one to blame except for my rash decision and my indecisive mind.

I hope, I seriously hope, with sincerity, that I would be able to find a solution soon. I love them, I really do =') Every decision I make is so pain :(

It was a last minute plan but I was so glad it happened :D So yesterday (Monday), me and Mr.N went for an evening date with dinner + movie + new house for children :P I realized there isn't much movies on the screen nowadays. Actually no. I should rephrase that. Not many movies on the screen which interest me. The Social Network is one movie I really wanted to watch after watching the trailer. It's Facebook man! :D

The movie is about the developing of the famous social network with have today, Facebook. Overall, the movie was a so-so. But I was really inspired and impressed by the way the social network was developed. It was really smart. Intelligent :)

It somehow made me think. If we have the talent or the ability on something, why not make it to good use? It somehow reminded me about what Bobby Ong ( a person I interviewed for my feature article ) said: it's the courage that matters. The courage to make the first step for a change. Everyone has the power to do something. But not everyone has the courage to take the step. I really agree with this statement.

It was really amazing how the idea/concept came and how the whole thing was developed. Of course facing lawsuits for the idea, but I still think that it is awesome.

Nice movie. Go watch if you want to get inspired. Rated 7/10.

Mood swing :(

You know how you are so happy & jumpy & excited & joyful, then the next second you become frustrated & indecisive & down & pain?

This is exactly how I am feeling now.

1 hour ago, I was so happy and so joyful; but now, I am feeling awesome indecisive, and perhaps even, scare :( Of course, I don't simply feel this way because I want to. It comes with a reason and honestly, I hate making important decisions in my life. Can't I just take both? But I know I shouldn't be greedy. But.. my mind is very contradicting with each other.

Su Wern, just be yourself. Not someone people want to see. I always have ways to comfort myself, to make myself more confident, and to talk myself into believing the decisions I had made. But it definitely won't be easy. I don't want any decisions I make to affect anything in my life. Neither do making them worse. That's the last thing I want.

But I have to constantly remind myself that this is life. Life is meant to be hard. It's meant to be full with hard & tough decisions to make. But why must is be so pain? I always feel my heart being pierced into two whenever I think about it. About all the decisions I have to make and all the things I have to let go for my decisions.

Maybe I just can't get through myself. But I will. I definitely will. I just want to fulfill my own promise. No matter how much it will hurt, or how much I have to sacrifice, I will do it. I will. I know it's all for the best. If this is how it should be; if sacrificial is crucial, then it's okay. But, if the sacrifice cannot guarantee my happiness for our future and it will cause more damage, I will give up on it.

It will be so hard. Real hard. But the best thing of all is, I know if I want to do it, I will always do it to the best. Because I know that I can do it. I have the ability. I have all it needs to be a good one. It's just my heart, whether if I want it or not.

It's so pain... I can feel that it's the beginning of all the hard decisions I am going to make in the future. I wonder when I can actually rest properly :(

Had been an awesome productive day staying in facing nothing but the laptop, leaving the room just for hamsters and foods :) Anyway, this is not the main point of this post.

You know how people always say things like "Love is blind"; or "when you are in love, you see nothing but only the good thing about your partner"? So, let me ask you a question, if you are in a relationship, or just simply, if you like someone, what do you think about the above statements?

For me, nonsense.

I am in a serious relationship. When I mean serious, I really do. I'm not the type of person who will start a relationship for the sake of starting one. For me, if I am to start a relationship, I would commit fully towards the relationship. If I see no ending towards it, I won't waste my time just to have someone as my 'partner'. Of course, the sincerity and the heart of the partner plays an important part as well.

So coming back, I don't really believe in those statements. Whenever I see statements like this, I always thought that people are just too immersed in their feelings of being in love.

Love is not just a feeling, it's a commitment, and the willingness of oneself to be prepared of anything that might come in the way.

It's not that simple, I admit. But the main concern is your heart. If you really love the person, you won't have to worry anything about the ending. Eventually, nothing will be an obstacle in the relationship if you really love the person and if you really want to be with the person. Nothing.

Love is magical. It's a charm, to cure you from any sadness or despair, and it charms away obstacles that get in the way.

Love is blind. It's not. You are the one who is blind. Because of being too immersed in your own feelings that you reject yourself from feeling anything else except of loving one person.

You see only the good things about your partner. I totally disagree. No one is perfect. No one can be perfect, no matter how hard you try. We are just human, and we are meant not to be perfect. So definitely there's bad things about your partner that you don't like. But the tricky part here is, how do you handle these truths and what do you think about them.

For me, I allow myself to love the imperfections of my partner instead of continuing to disapprove them.

I never want my partner to change for me. Because I believe that I love him because of who he is and not what I want him to be. It's always the same. Even after we had been together for more than one year, it's still the same. I am actually happy to see that he had grown so much and had tried to improve himself so much after he is committed to the relationship. Therefore, as his partner, I should be grateful for all the heart, passion, and determination he put into the relationship. With trust so deep that we will end up together to the end of our lives :')

For me, nah, I don't believe in perfection although I always try to be one but I believe that nothing can be define in the exact way. We define everything ourselves. So, our own happiness actually lies in our own hands. But I still think that understanding is the key word. Try to be more understanding, and more considerate towards your partners. Believe me, everything will work so well that it's almost impossible. It's not easy, mark you. But try :)

At this moment, I am really torn between several extremely important decisions. At this moment, I will so oblivious to things that are happening around me because there are just too much stuff in my mind. Decisions, decisions, decisions. I thought it was suppose to be a holiday? Why am I stuffed with all these difficult moments? It's like deciding between my life and my freedom.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Seeing how happy, how relaxed, and how stress-less you are now; I really don't have the heart to tell you what is troubling me. I don't want, by any chance, for me to become the reason of the ruin of your holiday mood.

Which should I chose? Because I know, whichever I've chosen, I will lose things that are extremely important to me as well. But no, I am not prepared, and never want to be prepared for any important sacrificial in my life. I know we can't be too greedy. We can't get all the things we want in life. But, at least, can I protect my own happiness?

Everything is linked. But maybe because of one decision I make, it will ruined everything. So how? Which one should I chose? Or perhaps, I will take both? Yeah, I think I will take both. I will maintain both. I will be able to. It's not impossible. I am not greedy, whatever you want to say about me. I just want to protect and fight for my own happiness. That's all. As simple as that. I don't want to give up on anything. Because I should fight for it, not waiting for it to come. I just want to make everyone happy. That's it. As simple as that.

Even if it means I have to carry more burdens with me because of this decision I had made, as long as I can still hold on and protect what is important, I don't mind. I am willing to.

p/s: Somehow, writing really makes me realize what I really want and what I really can and should do :)