I've got the weirdest dream ever. Weird but sweet. It had been a long time since I wished to remain in a dream, with the strong rejection towards reality. I don't know about others but a person like me - a true Aquarian, mind you - cannot stand things to be too common all the time. I'm still a free soul and I'm still yearning for changes and more different & heart-pumping experiences & adventures.
These days, I find myself moving back to the beat of music. The memories in music I love are very strong & influential. Honestly, it helps me escape reality and when I came back, I felt like a huge burden & worries had been lifted off my shoulders.
Reality is boring. I ought to make things more interesting. Starting with a vacation with the love ones :)
Let's talk about music. We always relate music to trends. But for me, personally, I don't listen to musics base on the trend. What matters to me is the meaning behind the song, and of course, in certain cases, the person singing the song. Thus, usually music/songs from certain movie/series tend to move me more.
One thing I really adore from anime is not the artwork - besides the plot lines - but also the voices behind the characters. I adore them as professionals in the creative industry, despite having to go through all types of training just to qualify themselves as part of the creative industry, and to obtain as many chances and experiences they can to reach a kind of celebrity status. The context I mean here is the context of Japan. In Japan, voice actors/actresses have the same celebrity level as the common celebrities we know.
I find them really amazing. Just through voices, they create a lot of meanings to everything. To become a seiyuu in Japan, you must be able to sing, to act, to host programs, and to voice-over in the same time. It's no easy job. And I can totally understand why people adore them. For me, this job is a respectable job not anyone can try out for.
Coming back to music, I am often moved towards meaningful (or emotionally-attached) character songs. Because I went through the whole journey, the songs produced actually give me more meaning than any other popular music in the society. I'm not a person who seek to be in-trend and everything. Let me share you a song.
This is a character song by Saariya from the Otome Visual Novel "Garnet Cradle". It's one of my favorite character songs because I can really feel the meaning and emotion behind this song, as I had went through the whole story plot. (You can't imagine how heart-pumping it was when the song appeared in the ending of the story).
I don't really look at the trend of music, but the meaning behind the song. How about you? What's your music taste :)
It's awesome to have friends who you can totally be yourself with them and who you know will stick with you through thick and thin. Friends who make you smile when you are stressed, depressed, or down. Friends who help with a sincere heart without hoping anything from you. Friends who care for you from the bottom of their heart. Friends who listen to you and take you seriously even when you don't make sense. Friends who know you are crazy but feel completely comfortable when they are with you and don't mind spending crazy times with you.
Laptop discharged sweet and awesome :) I knew you would never fail me! Heeee!
Happy Deepavali for all who are celebrating! I want murukuuuuuuu! :D
There is this sense of insecurity that had been haunting me for a while now. And it's really disturbing. Sometimes I find myself unable to think straight. Perhaps there's too much distraction? Or it's just my problem for unable to focus? I'm hating this feeling.
Am currently typing on a small lappy. My lappy was finally sent to the 'hospital' and will be discharging tomorrow :(
7 hours straight of classes today. I guess most of us are exhausted after the non-stop lectures. But somehow, I prefer it this way. Don't ask me why, perhaps I'm just weird.
Something I learned - be yourself. No matter what, be proud of who you are. Don't assume. Because sometimes your assumption just doesn't match the reality. So, don't think. Just be who you intend to be. And everything will definitely be awesome :)
(It's not that I no longer care. But sometimes I'm just too tired of meeting other's expectation so now, I will meet my own expectations instead. At least there will be no regrets. And yeah, at least I've done things I want to do.)
This might sound silly but I want to dedicate this post to my laptop. I am currently typing on a laptop who had been through thick and thin with me. A laptop who had never failed me. A laptop who endured all my inconsideration. A laptop who had always make me proud.
Now, this laptop of mine is facing physical injury. It occurred to me on the importance of this laptop. I cannot afford to lose him. And I know even though I replace him with another laptop, the feeling would never be the same again.
This laptop of mine - he had been contributing so much for me; had been tolerating with me; had been going through thick & thin with me; had been through countless all-nighters with me. I honestly don't know how should I go through everything without him. And most importantly (yes I'm repeating myself) he never fail me.
My laptop had been facing countless physical injuries within the 2.5 years (since June 2009) in my possession. But he survived. He always do. And this time, I know he will do the same as well :)
(No. This post is not to update on recent happenings.)
When I was in primary school, I stumbled upon this question that kept repeating in my head:"Why am I here?" Surprisingly, this one boy, are really tall - or more known as the most well-known guy in the whole school at that time - who sat beside me in class asked me the same question that had been confusing me:"Have you ever wonder why you are you?" Being honest, I answered 'yes', but it was really surreal, because I never know the answer, and I don't think that at that moment of time, I would be able to obtain any answers by solely thinking about the question. So I dropped it. The amazing fact is that I was not alone. There were people who was as weird as I am. I tried asking others and all I get was bewildered expressions from them and a look telling me that people thought that I was sick in the mind.
When I was in my primary years, everything was so different. I was so different.
When I was in my secondary years, everything changed. I no longer ask myself the same question and I decided to just go with the flow and move on with life. I was not the best student during my secondary years compared to the me in my primary years. But I was happy. I found myself doing everything I wanted to do and I felt freedom within me. At that time, I simply ignored others perceptions towards me. I simply did not care. I was free. Doing everything I wanted to do without any restrictions or boundaries. It was the best time of my life.
When I was in my secondary years, I was the person who seek for ultimate freedom.
When I was in my college years, everything changed. Again. All of a sudden, I felt this sense of responsibility within myself. And so, I collected the shredded pieces of myself and started all over again. I had my freedom physically, but I did not feel that I was freed emotionally. There was always a missing piece in my heart and I was stroked by constant confusion and frustration because at times I simply did not know exactly what I wanted. I felt so much restrictions. I wasn't happy. But I succeeded. I made everyone proud and happy.
When I was in my college years, I was thinking about choices & decisions. I was no more going with the flow.
Now, I am glad that I've started university. But I am having a mixed feeling within me. A mixed feeling consists of all the questions I had in myself. "Why am I here?" There's a lot of contradictions within me. Then, I find myself yearning for a new environment. I need a change. Like the change from primary to secondary and from secondary to college. I find myself unable to proceed being stuck in the same environment. But the most frustrating part is, I know that being in the same environment is somehow, a good thing for most of the people around me.
If it hurts you when you heard those words, it would probably hurt others too.
It's easy to just say "get over it". But whenever words are being spoken, it's impossible to be retrieved back. It's not a "no offence" or a "I'm sorry I didn't mean it" thing.
Everyone has feelings. And it is unfair for anyone to be judgmental towards anyone. If you do not like to be judged, others would not like it too. If you are being hurt in statements made by others about yourself, others would feel hurt as well.
Think before blurting out hurtful words. Even if words are not transmitted verbally, written words hurt too.
These days I had been feeling awesomely imbalance. Everything is not right. Constricted and restricted. Judgmental - something I despise, and will despise, for the rest of my life.
Welcome to my ranting ground. I write what I feel and I say what I think.
Enjoy your visit here and if there's any technical difficulties, feel free to mail me at suwerndono@hotmail.com.
Hey! I am Su Wern. 22nd January is my special day.
I am currently a Communication & Media Studies student, which is the most happening industry one can ever imagine :D
1.) I am UNPREDICTABLE.
2.) I have rapid mood-changing issue.
3.) I possess strong curiosity.
4.) My main motivation to do things is base on my personal interest.
5.) Observant.
6.) I crap and talk a lot to my close ones.
7.) I fear the sea.
8.) I am very possessive.
9.) I am stubborn.
10.) I often think too much.
11.) I am very protective towards people I love.
